Occasionally I come across a quote . . . I wonder is funny . . . or just dumb.
“I don’t exactly hate you, but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it” seems to be a bit of a head scratcher. Initially, it did pull me up a bit short and I could see the humor in it, but . . . If someone said that to me, I honestly don’t know what I’d think or do . . . maybe laugh . . . and maybe inquire as to why it was said, maybe shrug it off or perhaps reply, “Good to know.”
Of course, it depends upon who said it . . . and my particular mood at the moment.
There’s a major difference in responses depending upon the age group. Since I’m a mature adult, I don’t particularly care what others say or think of me. Well, that’s on a good day. If I’m down and feeling insecure, I might take it to heart and wonder why it was said. Of course, I’d dissect it word for word.
“I don’t exactly hate you . . .” That’s positive . . . but back-handed to a degree . . . maybe even wimpy.
“but if you were on fire and I had water, I’d drink it.” Whoa! That’s mean spirited. It contradicts the beginning of the sentence of not exactly hating me . . . so, I couldn’t expect help from this person . . . Almost like Nero playing the violin while Rome burned.
Perhaps the amount of water this person had wasn’t enough to put out the fire . . . or there was a message for me to bring my own water in case of such an event. It’s always good to be prepared.
So, possible responses would be:
Good to know.
Thanks for the warning.
Really?
Having a bad day?
What brought this on?
You see, for me, this seems to reflect more on the person making the comment than it reflected on me. I would wonder if they were just trying to be funny . . . or there was a deep seeded meaning behind it. Had I offended this person in some way? Would it be wise to engage him/her in conversation . . . or shrug it off?
Too often we don’t know the best comment. And, there are many factors to consider — how well we know the person and if it is worthwhile to pursue a friendship with him/her or was the person “grand standing” with friends?
Bullying has never been my strong suit — not in being a bully and not handling bullying very well. All I know is to ignore it and not allow it to get under my skin. I honestly don’t remember being bullied . . . I walked around with my head in the clouds most of the time. And if I was bullied, I ignored it . . . because I didn’t hear it.
When I was growing up, my family moved around a lot. I was always the new kid . . . so I had a lot on my mind . . . remembering my schedule, locker combination, or the location of the rest rooms. Some kids were nice and friendly . . . and then there were others . . . they were full of themselves and didn’t really pay attention to the rest of us . . . and if they chose to pick on me, I’d be preoccupied with the various thoughts that would ramble through my mind:
what’s for lunch?
what bus am I to ride home?
and if I didn’t ride the bus, would I remember my way home?
I’d be thinking about my homework . . . song lyrics . . . or whatever popped into my head. Sometimes I’d notice my feet hurt from the shoes I was wearing and how I was getting a blister on my heal . . . and if I had a band-aide or needed to get one from the nurse’s office.
Yes, I was a geeky kid . . . I made friends easily . . . but the older I got, the more difficult . . . but there were many who hadn’t grown up there . . . or didn’t fit in . . . I guess it’s more of a “thing” for kids today than it was back in my day. But, there was still a degree of bullying.
Isn’t that a sad commentary on modern society?
I don’t have any great advice on the subject or why I’m writing this . . . or picked that quote . . . at first it amused me, but now I’m no longer amused. Maybe my choosing it or writing about it has to do with something I heard on the radio . . . or in passing when I was running errands . . . or just one of those random thoughts that stuck in my mind . . .
Maybe it was a message I heard in church on the subject of “forgiveness.” We are to forgive, but not necessarily to forget. I may have heard it wrong when I was growing up or the message was wrong or I have it wrong now. Forgiving seems much easier than forgetting. The remembering gives us the lessons to grow . . . to mature . . . maybe even develop a tough skin so we aren’t easily offended and allow others to be and live as they choose without judgment. And not to go around with a chip on our shoulder.
When you stop to think of it . . . most conflicts in families and friendships stem from someone not forgiving and not forgetting . . . but allowing it to fester . . . and grow into something ugly . . . Jealousy comes to mind . . . I have a neighbor who is into one-up-man-ship, she always has to be right and always has to be better than me. That’s fine with me . . . it’s a waste of time for me to dwell upon such a thing. If it makes her feel good, good for her. I guess I’m just not that competitive or care. I’m confident with who I am. I have nothing to prove. She’s a fine woman with a loving husband and two grown children and I don’t know how many grandchildren, but she’ll remind me the next time I see her . . .
Isn’t life much easier when we follow the “golden rule” broadly translated to “Don’t do to others what you don’t want them to do to you.”
That seems to apply to everything . . . especially bullying . . . unless the bully wants to be bullied . . . but I don’t choose to be a bully . . . that would just keep the cycle going . . . or playing this senseless game with my neighbor . . . it’s a total waste of my time and energy . . . Obviously, in these two examples, the bully and the neighbor aren’t following the golden rule . . . and neither are others who use such tactics as lies, posturing and bullying to get what they want . . . and ruin others in the process . . . yes, you know who they may be . . . people at work, school, clubs, church . . . or even family members . . . and former friends . . .
Isn’t it remarkable that something so simple could truly make the world a much safer and healthier place?
It may not officially be summer, but the weather is feeling as though it is. We’ve been experiencing some of the normal June Gloom, but lately it has gotten hot and I do mean hot . . . high 90’s and threatening to reach triple digits.
Summer is not my favorite season . . . its the long, hot days that get me down. I do love it when the sun does go down and the evening gets cooler, but then the mosquitoes come out and chase me inside. I do love the BBQ and my vegetable garden, but it is primarily the heat that I don’t enjoy. I enjoy picnics in the mountains, camping by a running stream, telling ghost stories around an open fire . . . all things that have to do with cooler temperatures and a different setting.
Summer is a time to go on vacation . . . to get out of the summer heat . . . just as others see winter as a vacation time away from the cold harsh winter.
I do wonder if we’re ever satisfied with where we live and the weather conditions, regardless of the season. I may be a fair weather individual who likes to be comfortable . . . I prefer the cold to the heat, but not freezing cold . . . but with the right clothing, it may work. The problem with summer is that you can only take off so much clothing . . .
I have my neighborhood power walkers who get up early and pound the sidewalk. There are also the early morning joggers, jogging in the street. Of course, the dog walkers, too. These are hearty health conscious souls who are dedicated to their exercise ritual rain or shine throughout the year. Ice cream sales go up . . . and women complaining about gaining weight, but they’re hooked on ice cream sundaes for dessert every night. Many resort to using the slow cooker and BBQ. They’re looking for recipes of s’mores . . . I’m surprised by the variety I’ve come across . . . even a dip that is quite delicious and gooey.
It’s a good time to get into crafts — many for Halloween, but many go right into Christmas while others are into Easter . . . we all have our favorite season and our favorite holiday that interests us throughout the year. I had an old friend who loved Christmas so much she would have a Christmas in July party. This was so she could celebrate all the good things about the holiday without the bickering of relatives.
Halloween is also quite popular with summer and spring costume parties. My ghost hunting group loves having costume parties to tell and retell stories about their various adventures. Or to watch several of the popular series and make comments during the episode. Yes, we are critics . . . I like to learn something new . . . I’m not that adventuresome to go out to places at night to get the wits scared out of me. I’ve gone out during the day . . . at least this way when I run out of a known haunted place screaming it’s not in the dead of night. And, if you’re wondering, ghosts haunt 24/7/365. The reason most ghost hunting is done at night is because most of them work and there could be something to the “witching hour” concept. I just believe it’s a time when people are expecting something creepy, scary and paranormal to happen. And with the various urban legends and ghost stories, they happen at night . . . along with other disturbing things we hear about on the nightly news.
Whatever your holiday preference, summer is an excellent time to get your decorating ideas in gear and doing your crafts.
Summer is also a great time to get out and take pictures. It’s really an everyday thing, but vacations and holidays seem to be the reason for taking pictures. For some, they like to watch the heavens . . . some for UFOs and others just to do some serious star gazing.
There are many activities you may enjoy that I haven’t mentioned here. It does seem to be a long season, especially when I’m waiting for fall . . . but you’ll hear about it in September and may have read about it last September . . . my long anticipation of fall. Come to think of it, I’m longing for it right now.
These are just some thoughts that have been going through my head . . . and my observations while shopping . . . overhearing snip-its of conversations . . .
Have a great summer! I’ll be putting up more recipes and holiday ideas . . . yes, I do get into Halloween early . . .
It seems we are bombarded with all kinds of distressing news, even the weather can irritate us. I know the warm sticky weather we’re experiencing right now isn’t having a positive effect on my disposition. I’ve also chosen not to listen to the news other than to be informed. I’m beginning to think that newscasts just want to dwell on the negative. That’s not how I choose to live my life.
Happiness is a choice. We can choose to see the beauty all around us or see that the neighbor’s yard looks like a garbage dump.
I was at my local market last night. I was waiting at the deli counter to get some sliced roast beef for sandwiches and a snack for my sweet Diva. A woman was looking at the pastry display case. She looked, waited, glanced my way, looked at the display case, walked away . . . returned . . . then said, “Tell the girl there’s a fly in the pastry display case. I was going to get something, but not now.”
I was thinking about getting some danish, but after seeing the disgusting look on the woman’s face I decided to pass on the danish.
After my roast beef was sliced, I was hoping a fly wasn’t lingering on it. Then I remembered she had to open a new package.
I did tell the young woman behind the counter that there was a fly in the pastry display case. She merely shrugged and said, “What am I supposed to do? We try to keep the doors closed and we have these blowers, but flies get in.”
This got me thinking . . . was there a fly landing on my danish the last time I bought some? Is this a serious problem that I’ve been ignoring? I could feel my face contorting into the same disgusting look I saw earlier from the woman who brought the fly to my attention.
I walked around the store for awhile, gathering items . . . feeling a bit sick to my stomach . . . dwelling on the fly in the pastry display case . . . and wondering if it was a frequent guest . . .
Then I stopped.
I stopped thinking about the fly. I stopped thinking how I could have gotten fly cooties on my danish the last time I bought some. I stopped looking for flies.
Then, I remembered “Happiness is a choice.”
I felt fine when I arrived at the store. It was much more comfortable inside than out. I finished my shopping and went to check out.
I felt good. I was pleased I got the items I came for and my precious Diva would be happy to see me when I arrived home. I wasn’t thinking of the sticky warm weather outside. I chose to be happy and not dwell on the negative.
I sometimes forget “Happiness is a choice.” We are reminded every day in subtle ways of this fact. I suppose it is easier to fret and worry about stuff . . . is it conditioning? If so, than we can stop this pattern and go into another mode . . . looking and finding something to appreciate . . . count our many blessings . . . be grateful for what we do have and are capable of doing . . . finding happiness . . . or humor . . . just to break the cycle.
I truly love this blog where I can write about mundane things that happen at the grocery store . . . and turn it into a lesson . . . maybe more for myself than others . . . but if it helps you . . . this makes me happy.
Occasionally there is a phrase I hear that I can’t get out of my mind. “The Up Side of Down” is my current one.
I’ve been experiencing computer problems for well over a month with my monitor. Since it was still under warranty, I had my experience with the manufacturer who was great telling me what I wanted to hear, but terrible about follow through. I’m still looking for the e-mail with the information where I am to send my laptop for repair.
Messing around with the manufacturer’s customer service wasn’t anything I chose to do much longer and went out and bought a new laptop. The upside was that I have my old laptop available to transfer files and programs to my new one. It was also a way for me to clean up my computer — a major spring cleaning of sorts to keep only what was important to me. It’s amazing what I’ve saved in my documents file and download file.
This has also been a positive learning experience for me. I’m learning more about Windows 8.1 and my new laptop.
While my old laptop’s monitor was fizzling out on me, I was in the process of changing and revamping one of my websites. I was also able to crash it . . . fix it, continue working through the kinks. This is another one of those upsides . . . without these experience I wouldn’t have learned what I have in the process. Plus, I wouldn’t have learned valuable lessons.
Over the years I’ve been involved in internet marketing, I thought the important thing was to get a website up and running. Over the days, months and years I’ve made changes . . . some not so smart when I moved this website from one hosting company to another . . . losing all of my content and valuable visitors. But, selfishly, I needed a change. TwoCansOnAString.com was too big, doing too much. It bloomed into three websites . . . perhaps even a fourth is coming . . . I may be making the same mistake again . . . but I’ve learned how to save my content. And I know TwoCansOnAString.com is special to me . . . and will always be a bit of a mess with just about everything thrown in . . . as are the conversations we have with family and friends. Or when I was a child and playing with two cans on a string and trying to think of something to yell into my can for my friend at the other end of the string to hear. Were we pioneers just like Thomas Edison? Was the thrill we experienced similar to his when the tight string vibrated and sound was actually heard through the can next to my ear or next to my friend’s ear?
No matter what happens in life there is an upside of down. We sometimes have to search long and hard for it, but eventually, we’ll find it. It’s looking for that “silver lining” or the “bright side” as old song lyrics were crooned by singers of yesteryear.
We are all very fortunate to be living today with all the modern technology. We receive instant gratification at times . . . and other times not, which does make us humble . . . and we learn that sometimes things don’t work out as easily as we’d like it to . . . but there is always an upside of down.
Thanks for stopping by and reading this blog post. I hope this phrase has made you think about your life and perhaps the clouds have parted a bit to bring some sunshine into the darkness you may be experiencing. There are always things to bring us down and to turn us upside down, but I prefer to see the upside of down . . . but . . . being upside down may give us a new perspective . . . something else for me to think about . . .
I was visiting Pinterest and I noticed all the holiday stuff, especially Halloween. Then there was lots of Yorkie stuff, too. At the bottom of the post were the words “recommended for you.” Well, that solved the mystery of why there were pins that spoke to my interests . . . but it was a bit spooky, too, when I realized that Pinterest took notice of my viewing habits.
Maybe I should feel flattered, but I am a bit too creeped out right now. I enjoyed the assortment of pins, not those that were specifically recommended for me.
Technology is great, but maybe it’s time for me to clear my cache and see how the recommendations go. Variety is good. That’s why I followed some board.
I’m curious to see if others have experienced the same thing. Please leave a comment and let me know your interests.
I listened to this TED Talk by Adam Leipzig several months ago. I told others about it, but I didn’t put it here where it may find the right people who would appreciate it.
He asks 5 very important questions:
Who are you?
What do you do? Or perhaps more importantly, what do you feel you do well. Well, for some people this may be an important qualifier, but I’m wondering if that really matters. We enjoy doing things that we may not be very good at, but we enjoy it nevertheless.
Who do you do it for?
What do others want or need?
How do they change or transform as a result?
I must admit this gave me pause initially. I was hoping to discover something grand and wonderful, but I found out what I knew all along. It’s nothing to feel disappointed about. It’s that you’ve known your life purpose all along without the help of psychics, numerology, astrology and the like. This isn’t hocus-pocus vodoo or mind altering parapsychology. It’s just a new way of discovering who you are and what you do is valuable to others.
The last part of the “talk” is what really wowed me — how to describe what you do in a powerful sentence. You are a unique individual who is special. It doesn’t matter what you do, what matters is how you feel about what it is you do. This is where the real you shines.
